Shopping Sprees and Fiscal Responsibilities

You may not know this, Gentle Reader, but the minute you sign the papers to buy a house, that very minute is the minute when all your girly underpinnings spontaneously fall apart.
(I mean, if you are of a lady-like persuasion and wear such garments.)
And there you are, holding scraps of black Lycra, left with that one sexy bra that you don’t wear much because you just don’t have That Kind of job, saying to yourself, “Dammit, boobs! I did not allocate funds for your upkeep in this fiscal quarter!” And you tough it out by wearing the ridiculous bit of fluff for two weeks solid until you’re finally like, “This aggression will not stand, man.” And you’re like, “Boobs, get in the car, we’re going to that cheap place to get you sorted.”
And then while you’re shopping you happen to come across a pack of three off-brand Thera-bands. And you’re like, sweet, add to cart, bitches, needed some of these mofos anyway, look out feet, you’re about to get strengthened.
And then you happen to walk past the rack of body-slimmers and girdles and you’re like, “Ha! Look at these adorable granny-panties!” and then you’re like, “No joke, these granny-panties are seriously adorable.” And then you pull them off the rack and they’re just a simple, heavy weight, stretchy, matte finish, solid black highwaisted almost bathing-suit bottom type thing, no lace or lingerie details, low leg line, and you’re like, “I could totally rock these granny-panties in ballet class. Like over a leo. Or with a T-shirt.” And then you’re like, “no, that’s crazypants.” And then you’re like, “They’re only $6 try them on Immediately.”
And then you try them on, over your own undies of course because you are not a heathen, and they are a size XL but that’s good because instead of the sausage-casing they’re meant to be they are just snug. Like high waisted ballet shorts.
Sweet, add to cart!
So that’s the shopping spree part.
The fiscal responsibility part is this:
When the work schedule is iffy, the Adult Beginner has a self imposed limit of two ballet classes per week. When work is steady, I allow myself three. Happily work has stabilized in time to add pointe as my third class per week.
There maybe some overtime, which means more money, which is good, but less time to take classes.
Just one of the realities of adult ballet study.
The audition episodes of So You Think You Can Dance last year were the first time I really noticed this type of reality being reflected in reality tv. A lot of the kids auditioning had huge heaps of talent but had had to stop taking class when the family budget went all to hell during the economy’s Manic Depression.
They were good kids, they were being very brave about being cut from the show for that reason.
And then the other day I was reading up about wild birds because, like, now I have some yelling their fool heads off in the yard all day long, and came across a quote that said the presence of wild birds is a positive indicator of the ecological health of an area and I was thinking, hey, it’s like dance, the presence of dance is a positive indicator of the economic health of an area.
So, here’s hoping for lots more dance for everyone in the years to come.
And wild birds.
And granny-panties.


About adultbeginner

Had my first ballet class Ever at the advanced age of thirty-two. Yikes.
This entry was posted in Bark! Bark! Bark!, OMG outfits you guys!, the stuff drawer and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Shopping Sprees and Fiscal Responsibilities

  1. chrisgo1 says:

    Love the Lebowski reference! Plus, it’s good to know that granny-panties can be substituted as ballet shorts.

  2. Margaret says:

    Those are shockingly adorable granny-panties. I was envisioning the tan things with the diamond stitching and wasn’t sure how any granny-panties could ever be cute.

    I stand corrected.

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