The usually reticent Adult Beginner is thrust into the public eye, belly first.

Funny thing about being pregnant-
And I’m talking the big end of pregnant, not the early just little bit pregnant part-
Is that Everybody Can Tell.
I fly home solo from New York? Man in seat beside me tells me how to find a good doctor.
I’m like, ‘Dude. I am wearing headphones. Big ones too, like dj big, no petite earbuds here. And I’m reading a book. And my tv is on. There are no more polite signals for me to send you that I don’t want to chat. Also, have you never flown before? Do you not understand that this is Basic Airplane Etiquette? We maybe say hello when we sit down and then we Do Not Speak for five hours. Also, seriously? I’m this big and you think I haven’t got a doctor yet? As if!’
But never mind all that because he can see I’m in the family way and he wants to talk about it.
Mr. Adult Beginner flies home solo? Nobody bothers him because Nobody Knows.
Reminds me of this thing I read somewhere about how this is one of the difficulties severely overweight people face: their Problem is out there for everyone to see, whereas people with other problems mostly get to keep their problems private.
I’m a little bit terrified to go into any baby-supply store because I’m such an easy mark right now. Even wandering just around ABC Home store, clerk takes one look at me and points to the baby department.
On the other hand, cocktail parties have become way easier.
I never worry anymore about running out of cocktail chat, even with strangers.
And luckily for them no strangers have gone in for the belly-pat.
‘Cause I am ready.
To karate chop their Face!
Anyway, was just thinking about the public-ness of pregnancy while paying for groceries. And chatting with the cashier about when am I due.
Thinking about how I’ve stood in that same line, in fifth, or doing relevés, or wearing a leotard and mini, or with convertible tights all rolled up around my calves, obviously straight outta ballet class where I pretended to be a ballerina for an hour and fifteen, and nobody cares! But start showing a little and everyone’s your new BFF.
It’s neat that humanity becomes excited and welcoming around pregnant ladies.
Except for when it’s annoying.
But it’s still pretty neat.
But it’s still kinda annoying.
But it’s neat.

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